The Seventh Post – Because I Remembered I Had This Blog

Hi Everybody,

So I guess I’m probably going to end up just writing thoughts and stuff on this blog.  As much as I wanted this whole thing to be a crusade to get my script noticed, it’s way harder than that.  I admire people who have such a strong drive to do things creatively that it becomes their career because I’ve never had that.  And while I am wildly passionate about writing, it is an escape for me.  That’s how it’s always been assimilated into my being, and when I have nothing to escape from, it gets harder to write.  And then all the stuff after the writing, like this blog, kickstarter, whatever, that’s all like the management stuff that I get instantly demotivated from.  Not because I’m not passionate about my work, but just because.  My free time is dedicated to my family, so it’s not so easy to find little blocks of time to work on things like this very purposeful blog.  And that’s okay for me.  My family is my life; nothing makes me happier than being with them.  So it’s all good.

You know, until I remember I started this blog and should freakin write something on it.

Contrary to what I just said in that first paragraph, writing has been better than ever actually.  I’ve got lots of ideas.  Even if they don’t translate to words 100% of the time, when I do finally find a voice, I’m writing to completion and not getting blocked.  For me, my personal life has a lot to do with getting writer’s block because I tend to get distracted.  I also used to have this problem where I would tell the story I was writing and then I’d lose the story.  It happened way too many times.  That outlet is long gone though (thankfully), and so when I have a really nice grip on a story, I’ll tell my wife.  She’s the outlet that keeps my creativity flowing and I’m quite thankful for that.  She knows when to ask me for more and when to not, which is important because if I tell too much of a story, it begins to slip away from me.  I have this odd thing in my mind where when I’m writing a story, that story is coming into existence right then, regardless of how much is in my head, when the words are written, now the story is alive.  And if I go blabbering to someone about the whole story before I’ve written it, then it’s already been told and now there’s no point in writing it.  Just a me thing.

Right now, I’ve been writing a little differently.  The last time I touched Misophonica was when a friend read it and offered some ideas to me.  That was over a month ago.  Then came some personal things that I’ve been dealing with.  One or two things that have overtaken my mind and forced most other things out.  I’ve gotten a handle on those now (thanks to THIS youtube channel), and I’m back to creating something semi-new.  I love writing scripts.  And writing is a numbers game.  The more you write, the better you should get.  And the more you write, the more you have to send to people to get noticed.  Something’s hopefully going to stick somewhere if you have ten things out there as opposed to one.  So I’m undertaking an adaptation that I’ve thought about for years.  I wrote a short novel called The City’s Assassin.  The first novel I was really proud of with a complete story and no frayed loose ends.  I’ve always pictured it as a 10-ish episode show on HBO or something like that, so I’m translating it to a script.  It’s really fun.  I love using an existing show that I loved as an example of how to write.  I did it with Misophonica too.  I’m using the pilot of Sneaky Pete for my example this time.

I’m sure I’ll post the City’s Assassin pilot script once I’m happy with it.  But I do believe I’m going to take my time.  Whew.  Might be a boring entry today.  But I guess sometimes, I just need to write some thoughts down.

Acceptingly yours,

Matthew Raup

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